"I learned to cope with my asthma positively" | Shaena Jilaysha Perera, 15

One word. The one word that haunted me wherever I went. It trailed behind me, ever ready to pounce at any given moment. I remember calling it my disability. It was the one thing I wished to free myself from. Many people had called me names and watched me suffer as I lay there gasping for the slightest bit of air, calling me "the asthma girl" or "the girl who couldn't live without an inhaler." I felt like the monster in every childhood book. The one everyone hated. The one that was hideous and flawed. I had cried myself to sleep every night, replaying the harsh words said to me repeatedly. As the tears rolled down my eyes, I would make a silent wish. To be rid of this torturous disease, this plague of a thing called asthma.

The day I had felt most like a monster was the day I should have been the happiest. Asthma had stripped all the happiness in my life and replaced it with the feeling of agony. I had won the award for the swimming championship and as I walked up to the podium proudly, I felt the familiar tightening in my chest followed by what felt like the weight of a thousand gold bars crushing my body. The pain only got worse with every struggling breath I took. It felt as if someone was squeezing the air out of me. My whole body felt alien, but the worst part was watching my classmates' faces painted with annoyance and hearing the quiet laughter fill the room. At that very moment, I realised that I would never again let this disease dictate my life and dreams. I would use it to strive for greatness. The word that once haunted me is now my motivator and I learned to cope with my asthma positively.

Real Life Asthma Stories Booklet

This asthma life story is part of a booklet of stories created for community engagement in Malaysia. Read all the stories in the booklet produced by the University of Malaya and Universiti Putra Malaysia, RESPIRE partner organisations in Malaysia.